Monthly Musings: September

1. I am part of a team

Back when Tyler and I were considering making Dallas our home, we discussed the fact that we would stepping out on our own as a young family. For the first time together, we would be far from families and all things familiar. We failed to realize that we would not in fact be a totally independent family unit in our new home. Instead, we have joined new communities: at work, at school, in our neighborhood, and at church. Most surprising for me is the support I have found at school. Prior to enrolling, I observed classes and interviewed students; they all said the same thing: Meadows is a community, the professors desire student success, classmates support one another. True to my cynicism, I'd decided it was too good to be true and went into the start of the semester expecting some of those expectations to be deconstructed.

My experience over the last month of school, however, has proven me wrong. I am daily blown away by the patience, encouragement, advocacy, and approachability of my professors. While I do indeed have much to learn, they treat me as a contributor, partner, and teacher, not just an ignorant student in need of their educational salvation. My classmates are part of this team, too. They don't hide their weaknesses, questions, or feelings of uncertainly in hopes to portray themselves as model students; instead they speak openly of the challenges they face and encourage me in my weaknesses. I can't imagine a better school environment for me, especially as I am intentionally trying to remove myself from a strict performance-based, comparison mode of operation. Here I am taught not only to learn the right answers but also to own and learn from my mistakes - to thrive as a musician and teacher. Every day is a challenge in many regards, but these I face not on my own.

Master class in Caruth

Weekly group class

2. Homesickness flares up at odd times

Last week I was teaching a lesson and poof! The sights, sounds, smells, and tastes of Tijuana Flats burst into the room. Instantly I was filled with a longing, not only for tacos, but physical location of that little restaurant in our hometown. Silly, isn't it, that I would have a craving for tacos from home while living in Texas?

Over the weekend, these feelings intensified. My family had just returned from Anna Maria Island (my favorite beach!), and Ty's was partying it up at The Happiest Place on Earth. In some regard, I mourned the loss of not being with them. I missed what was, even though I know what is remains good and right. My sweet MIL pointed out that knowing we are exactly where we are supposed to be doesn't make moments like these any easier.

I mean, look how awesome they are!

One of my childhood friends lives overseas, and she recently blogged about coping with homesickness. My mom just happened to mention she'd seen this post. It reminded me that I have the freedom to feel homesick and mope around a bit. On Saturday, I did just that. I cleaned my house, did the dishes, bought a pumpkin at Walmart, baked pumpkin muffins, and set out the two pieces of fall/Halloween decor that I had brought from home. I felt incredibly better. And when my husband walked in the door and gave me a huge hug, I felt ever better.

Over lunch the following day, my friend, Hannah, reminded me that it's a good thing to feel the loss of daily interaction with our families. After all, they are people worth missing, and it doesn't mean we're discontent if we admit to that loss. Following Mary Elisabeth's advice, we also set out to find something new we enjoy about our city. Namely: dessert. A trip to a favorite local custard shop will cure just about anything.