Take Your Own Advice, Teacher

One of my students is a perfectionist. I don't relate at, of course. (Insert sarcastic tone.)

Today at her lesson we took a break from recital music and chatted. I asked her,
"What is the purpose of music?"
When she looked back at me with pleading eyes and responded, "To play everything correctly?" my heart ached. I have believed this so many years. Still do on so many days.

It's a hard tightrope to walk, playing your best while not being anal about every mistake. (That's my professor's favorite word to describe me: anal. Very flattering.)

I looked at this sweet girl and spoke words of Grace and Truth.
"You don't have to be perfect. Always do your best, but nobody expects perfection."
I could feel the struggle inside her surfacing.
"But if I play a wrong note, don't I have to go back and fix it?"
"What do you mean it can still be wrong if I play everything correctly?"

She was looking for a formula, the one I've been searching for all my life.

"What is the purpose of music?"

I spoke her name and invited her to meet my eyes, take in my words:
"Music is about communication - saying what's on your heart and mind."
We talked of how our words affect others; for instance saying "I love you" to someone evokes a response, as should the sound that proceeds from an instrument.
We talked of the joy the performer should feel, instead of the stress that always accompanies anal perfectionism.

We talked, and I can only hope I was listening.